Cowboy Confessional

Normally I am saddened to witness a fellow human sink into the abyss of madness.

But for Tim Robbins I’ll crack open a fresh bottle of Jack Daniels and bid his brain a joyous bon voyage.

Tim is a possum in political animal zoology - slow witted, ugly, odoriferous and leaving the bad taste of road kill in one’s mouth. Leveraging his marginal fame, which in turn is based on his marginal acting abilities, Tim thrust himself into the political arena with the confidence that only complete idiots posses.

This time the poor folks attending the National Association of Broadcasters (NAB) suffered Tim’s delusional diatribe. Having attended two NABs myself and witnessed first hand the utter insanity of the mass communications market, it was difficult for me (until today) to imaging anything that could add to the intellectual chaos therein.

The last year I attended NAB I stood at the intersection of two isles, and witnessed a near collision of professional wrestlers from the WWE, models from the Playboy Channel, and a televangelist who — momentarily distracted by the passing semi-clothed men and women — stood in helpless bewilderment.

They had nothing on Timmy.

Seemingly unaware that he was speaking to the proverbial hand that feeds him, Tim initiated a monologue on the deficits of the media. News reports from NAB tell that Tim could not speak a sentence without inserting multiple profanities, making his remarks unavailable for broadcast.

Though cursing is the sign of a weak mind and a weaker vocabulary, it is not in and of itself proof of madness. But the following quote is:

“Just when we were close to a national news media providing a general consensus on what the truth is …“

First is the rather psychotic notion that the media has ever come close to reporting what the truth is (whether they know what “truth” is, and if what they report instead of truth are entirely different matters). For Timmy to bank his political hopes on the old media is like a drunk pegging his ambitions on holy water.

Media madness aside, Tim was scarily close to Goebbels’ axiom. If the national news media were to agree upon what the “truth” is, then it would sure-as-sin be a lie. In one breath Timmy was lambasting the media for not being inquisitive enough, then in the next breath seems to believe they need to have consensus. The two objectives are mutually exclusive, unlike the questions “will the sun rise in the east” and “is Tim Robbins insane?”

Let’s set in concrete Tim’s nutty notion that there is one truth and that the media (of all people) should know and agree upon what it is. He then skids completely off the mental highway by saying:

“… along comes the Internets [sic] that allows its users a choice on the kind of news it watches and the YouTube. My God, we’ve got to stop them.”

The interesting thing about the Internet (singular) is that it allows anyone willing to spend $12.95 a month to be a broadcaster. In other words, the Internet is the Grand Democracy were every man, woman and hermaphrodite can speak his/her/its mind. All ideas are set forth for public exposure, critique, ridicule, analysis, and adoption through thoughtful process.

And Tim Robbins is against this.

What Timmy is really against is thought. All intellectual pursuit that does not fit his political myopia is to be shunned, discarded, and ignored by the old media. Your voice is unimportant. Alternate perspectives are to be reviled. Only the consensus of his hand chosen Illuminati needs to be considered valid.

Sail into the maelstrom of dementia Timmy. You won’t be missed.

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Be wary of stupid people in large groups. They tend to be dangerous.

Just watch any session of Congress.

Today’s lunacy lesson revolves around a tiny film called Fitna. The video involves the Quran (or Koran for American journalists) and was produced by a non-Muslim. That combination alone is enough to ignite lethal agitation among zealots sans intelligence (if I may be redundant).

In this presentation, producer Geert Wilders simply shows verses from the Quran, then plays video of Islamists who obviously wound their turbans too tightly. For each of these select passages Wilders shows the verses being used as justification for abusing women, slavery and homicide. Wilders’ point appears to be that like many religions before, some people are using Islam to justify theological fascism.

You know, like the Roman church did by posting a copy of Deuteronomy in every inquisition waiting room.

Granted, Wilders put a prickly point on his presentation, using some of the more graphic (though edited) videos produced by Islamist for Fascism, Inc. (if you don’t like seeing a masked jihadist holding aloft a freshly severed caucasian head, then don’t watch Finta). Wilders’ selected footage is the best of their worst, or as I like to say “the cream of the crap.”

But at no place in the video does Wilders call Islam a bad name, defame Mohamed, or call for reverse jihad. He simply exposes people misusing religion as a means for their maniacal mission.

Tell that to the Islamist. Well try to tell them if you can get them to quit scream and burning effigies long enough to engage in thoughtful discussion (yes, I know — I’m pissin’ into the wind with that notion).

All too predictably, after the film hit the Internet violence erupted among Islamic hot heads (how can your head not be hot when you live in the desert and is wrap your head in turban — maybe they have simply baked their brains to the point of imbecility). “They call this freedom of expression, but it’s freedom of aggression,” said one over agitated ass. Failing to have watched the film or to dispassionately consider Wilders’ core message, he continued with the obligatory “God is great.”

Well, at least he got something right. I hope he joins one group that marched in protest of the film. They were wearing headbands that read “We are ready to sacrifice our lives for the sanctity of the prophet”.

That can be arranged.

What would be amusing were it not for the sadness of stupidity is that Radical Islamist have detached themselves from reality. Sane people who watch Wilders’ film will not think less of Islam. They would instead see an analysis of how dimwits with dictatorial dementia abuse the Prophet’s words to justify their temporal tantrums. Loons — like the leadership of Jamate-e-Islami — are Wilders target.

Likewise with my literary cross-hairs and Leupold scope.

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I always thought tattoos were dangerous. Now we have proof.

I don’t have any objection to tattoos on principle. In fact, a well placed tattoo on a woman can be sexy (especially if one treats them as a set of handlebars). But so many people now have tats that it is no longer cool. Skin and ink has become mainstream, and the few of us not wearing body art are the differentiated minority.

I always thought allowing some random biker — with a prison record and suspect hygiene — to jab a used needle into my epidermis bordered on insane. But two mentally challenged Texans have made getting a tattoo almost fatal.

Seems that either Robert Glasser and Joey Acosta of El Paso wanted a tattoo of a revolver. So in order to make their tat as realistic as possible, they decided to trace a real .357 mangle’em.

They didn’t bother to unload it first.

Somehow, Robert and Joey managed to shoot themselves at the same instant. One round staffed Robert’s hand and then clipped Joey’s arm. For this to happen, both “men” would have to have been on the barrel side of the loaded and cocked handgun. Triple stupid.

Sadly, Robert and Joey do not qualify for a Darwin Award, but might receive an honorable mention for trying.

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