Sacrosanct Sodomy
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People are people except when they are animals.
Even Pakistani people.
I’m not going to pick on Pakistan or Pakistanis, or Polacks, or Peruvians, or Pennsylvanians (though that last group deserves scrutiny … Steelers fans often demonstrate psychotic tendencies). Yet when a brand is violated by those who own a brand – such as when Apple iPhones flake – then some good natured rib jabbing is in order.
But please don’t jab Steve Jobs’ ribs. You might hit the reset button on his second hand liver.
Pakistan is one of those oddball countries who think mixing religion and politics is wise, a position that survivors of the Inquisition will vigorously debate. Thus the edicts, ethos and etiquette of the religion are codified in law and conspicuously practiced by the population. Sect dissimilarities aside, certain things are frowned upon and others are promoted. Like every religion, Islam tends to amplify its good points and play down its lunatic preachers (seriously, there isn’t a dimes’ worth of difference between Jeremiah Wright and Ayman al Zawahiri). Islam and Christianity share common roots, and among other things frowns upon evils like incest and lite beer.
Interesting then is the fact that Pakistanis are ape over donkey sex.
Google lets people drill into Google tracking data. Google Trends allows any person perform interesting drill-downs, including such things as discovering that Pakistan has achieved the highest per capita search rate for “horse sex” for six years running and “child sex” for almost as long. They are also especially interested in rape and extracting revenge from dogs that hump their legs by humping them back. And, yes, “camel sex” is also popular, though there is no indication if Pakistanis prefer one hump or two.
Drawing a cartoon of Muhammad could get you stoned in Islamabad, though not in the pleasant sense, yet searching for and consuming child rape videos are raging pastimes.
Granted, you find sheep shaggers in every country (rumor is that Scotsmen wear kilts because sheep can hear a zipper from 50 yards). Virginia residents think every vertical male in West Virginia has intimate knowledge of the reproductive regions of a sow. And rumors of what Kiwis do on wool farms is legendary. Yet in a land where Islamic virtue is law, it seems that animal husbandry is a very real concept. This is the side effect of parochial polygamist societies – the bachelors don’t have single women or even infected hookers with which to do the dirty.
And forget about boinking other men – that could cause neck pains.
Pakistan’s recreational extreme porno habit raises the question why Pakistan has not cracked down. Being a country with an autocratic government in a state of perpetual paranoia about India, their Internet hubs have been under control and surveillance since shortly after copper wire appeared inside their borders. It is doubtful that authorities there are unaware of Pakistani peccadilloes, though we have to concede that maybe all these unseemly searches come from Pakistani government offices (your foreign aide dollars at work). So Pakistan is tolerating, and perhaps even endorsing dalmatian diddling, camel copulating, filly fornication and bambino boinking.
Maybe because it is sanctified by Islam.
Granted, I am no Islamic scholar. All religions are null programs, and anybody who seriously thinks they speak for Gawd started the day by chewing through their restraints. Yet it appears that certain sexual intersections that would put you on Texas’ death row are openly permitted in Islam. Muhammad himself had a bride so youthful that even Brigham Young (a.k.a. Bring’em Young) blinked. Ayatollah Khomeini, the man who turned a secular Iran into the golden palace/shower that it is today wrote that frolicking with farm animals was alright providing you killed them afterwards. Not only does this prevent tainted meat from entering commerce, it also gets rid of the witnesses.
Unless your kid/wife was watching.
So perhaps Pakistan’s proclivities are proper. If the state religion permits pedophilia and heavy pet petting, then perhaps the Pakistan censors who shut down access to Facebook merely saw nothing unusual when Abdul accessed ass ass and Gabir Googled goats. Perhaps Pakistani authorities thought these were perfectly natural unnatural acts, though porking Porky is certainly a sin.
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