Cowboy Confessional

May you have the good fortune to die on a slow news day.

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“The great enemy of clear language is insincerity. When there is a gap between one’s real and one’s declared aims, one turns as it were instinctively to long words and exhausted idioms, like a cuttlefish spurting out ink.”

– George Orwell, “Politics and the English Language”, 1946

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I posted a rough hack of a 2003 song I wrote when I first subjected myself to the irony of Internet dating … and all the psychotic dementia that can induce.

Titled “Electronic Love” there is enough innuendo to make the lyrics amusing. For anyone who has seen how the net can both enhance and cripple relationships, the rest of the song will be a painful reminder.

This rough hack is very dirty sounding due to my over experimentation with the recording equipment. But there is one lesson that came out during the production of this test piece, namely experiment with everything!

The lead guitar didn’t have a sound I liked, and while pondering what to do I kept clicking through the various effects that were packaged with the digital audio workstation software (Sonar Studio if you are curious). There was one item in the effects list I had not noticed before, and it was a guitar effect rack simulator called Revalver. When it opened I saw a classic 19″ rack loaded with gear in just the way old analog musicians are used to. A quick experiment with the presents and I found a grungy effect that isn’t exactly what I want, not it is 90% closer than what I had.

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Anyone retaining respect for the United Nations will jettison their misguided sentiments next year.

But there is an option.

Come spring when even atheists catch a glimmer of God in the annual renewal of life, the U.N. will host an anti-racism conference. Like most Orwellian institutions, the name given saints disguises the monster beneath.

The head of the monster de jure is the chairman of the committee who hails from Libya. Unknown for its adherence to civil or human rights, yet well known for explicit links to bombing jumbo jets and an aggressive WMD program, suspicion of Libyan racial intolerance is understandable.

Since criminals are pack animals, hand-selected “friends of the chair” will include Iran and other ideological backwaters. The explicit aim of the conference leadership appears to again claim that Zionism is a form a racism and thus the only way to counter such is to be even more racist (repeat until dizzy and you will have as good of a grasp of mid-East politics as anyone). A European Union proposal to discuss “freedom of expression” as part of the conference was denied as being “political in nature.”

Odd. The U.N. is a political machine but with less class, honor and ability than all the others. Why not discuss political matters?

The anti-racism conference is an offshoot of the U.N.’s Human Rights Council which has little to do with rights and appears to be opposed to humans. An idealist recently proposed that the Council oppose female genital mutilation, a procedure performed in barbarous localities and whereby many enjoyable pieces of the feminine reproductive system (clitoris, labia) are removed with little warning and no anesthetic.

Egypt’s response was “We will not discuss issues related to Shariah law.”

The U.N. is hopelessly soiled. Since U.N. membership is open to all nations — regardless of what band of baboons run these countries — co-opting the organization to spread human abuse is a natural direction for the U.N. to go. Like welfare offices everywhere, the U.N. cannot discriminate between good and bad actors and in short order the evil, corrupt and lazy run the show.

Hence the un-UN (also warmly referred to as the Alternate U.N. or Liberty league). The proposal calls for free nations to form a new confederation with higher admission prices to keep out the riffraff. The gauntlet might include a list of civil and human rights and a track record of adherence (which means my friends in the U.K. and Mexico might have a tough time getting in given their bans on self defense tools).

This alternate United Nations would receive most of the cash currently dumped into United Nations Plaza. The lucre would be used to actively export freedom and counter balance anti-human initiative, instead of extravagant life styles for third world diplomats. It would also provide free nations a perpetual planning forum for promoting freedom universally.

And the weakened United Nations would remain as a year-round debating society and a good place to keep careful watch on the likes of Lybia and their pals.

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John Edwards claims he is not the father of a child whelped by the woman with which he had an affair. For months Edwards publicly denied his tryst and now he denies he spawned the scion out of wedlock.

Where was Bill Clinton nine months before the blessed event?

While confessing to ABS News Edwards also said “You cannot beat me up more than I have already beaten up myself.” You would think a politician would understand the media better than that.

Dear John, the journalistic butt kicking has only begun. Your former friends in the media have found a more interesting story than Russian invading Georgia and will ride it like a payday cowboy on a Vegas hooker.

Speaking of Vegas, betrayed wife Hillary Clinton was in Las Vegas today and in reaction to Edwards confession said as little as possible.

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