Cowboy Confessional

I love stand-up comedy. Why this ex-cowboy enjoys that form of entertainment is still a mystery. I suspect it is the only pastime that reinforces my cynical nature.

In the current crop of stand-up funnymen, nobody is more side splitting hilarious that Osama bin Laden. Now one normally doesn’t equate international terrorism with humor, but when bin Laden writes a fatwa, releases an audio tape, or produces a video … well I drop whatever I’m doing because a solid belly laugh is guaranteed.

He delivered once again, providing Al-Jazeera, Al Qaeda’s tactical PR wing, an audio tape that again provides yucks aplenty.

He begins his monologue with the witty non-sequitur that he alone was responsible for the 9/11 attacks. This borders on slapstick as he dances like a puppet in the middle of 12 hijackers, hundreds of financial support liaisons, his right-hand joke writer Ayman “Rhymes with hymen” al Zawahiri, and an ensemble of stage hands, producers, directors, and cast.

Bin Laden then contrasts this absurdly funny and egocentric statement by claiming that America is ebbing. What makes this gag work is America seems to actually be ebbing … they are removing some troops from Iraq due to having so few Al Qaeda personnel left to kill, the bulk of them fleeing or providing fertilizer to green zone shrubbery. Current events humor really is bin Laden’s style.

Bin Laden then takes a risk by doubling-up on that punchline, saying that America was unjust for invading Afghanistan in an attempt to kill the “only person responsible for 9/11.” I almost suffocated laughing at that one.  Perhaps that is bin Ladens new battle plan — make the West laugh itself to death.

Sadly, Al-Jazeera (who should rename their corporate brand to ‘Al Jester’) only provided exerts from the yet to be released full-length audio. Rumor has it that bin Laden has signed a recording deal with Atlantic Records, who has been the label for numerous comedians. Can we hope there will be a bin Laden Box Set for Christmas?

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